HS2 BenefitsHave you ever wondered why…

  • The telly is always full of programs about benefit claimants?
  • Why the senior executives of Britain’s largest companies have had to have annual wage increases of up to 50%, while most people have had below-inflation wage rises?
  • Why the tax-payer has been drafted in to pay back the ‘sub-prime’ gambling debts with years of something we have been told is called ‘Austerity’?

The shocking truth is:

‘The poor have all the money’!

I know it sounds a bit odd, but think about it… the facts speak for themselves.

The top echelons are so skint that they have to put their assets in their wife’s name and send what meagre surplus money they possess to the Cayman islands, just to keep their heads above water.

Even the tax-man, known for being rather unsympathetic over money owed, appears reluctant to ask them to pay any more tax than they think they should (I would not be surprised, if many of these unfortunates are washing cars on a Sunday, just to make ends meet).

Presumably the rich were so desperate to improve their miserable existence, that they had no choice but gamble on sub-prime as a last-ditch attempt to make some money.

So when the rest of us are expected to dig deep into our meagre savings, to build them a high speed train to get to work twenty minutes early, we should do so gladly. The additional working time might help these unfortunates avoid having to deliver pizzas or take up baby-sitting and spend a little more time with their families.

If you have a bedroom that is not used for at least five hours a day, are a fireman, policeman or nurse, you might consider paying a bit more to the banker’s austerity fund. With your help the rich can pay off a bit more of the gambling debt each year, rather than just paying the late payment penalty.

You can also help by blaming each other, rather than the rich. That is what successive governments have devoted most of their time to and we must follow their sterling example. Do not be fooled by people queuing at food banks, they are simply saving up their money to gamble it on the stock-market.

First published 23rd April 2015